A darker shade of grey
Every time I look at any list of the CEOs of the top companies I see more women on that list than most. Yes I can count like some can – yes we all see 5 or 6 female CEOs out of a list of 50 for example. However I still see more women on that list than most.
Here’s why: Many weeks ago now I was discussing this very issue with a few friends. One of the ladies proceeded to label me a ‘male feminist’ – a first for me to be honest. I laughed out loud. Not at her or her comment but rather at myself. You see I don’t really know what a feminist is in real terms these days let alone the ‘male’ version. I am so confused by the multitude of images we are constantly bombarded with that, I can’t honestly identify anyone who stands out as a clear example of what a feminist stands for these days. Truestory. I asked others for their working definition in my typical attempt to gain more knowledge about this pertinent issue and I received a variety of non-related answers and a colourful array personalities. For the purposes of writing this scribe, I leave this ‘how to define a feminist’ and subsequent examples for another day – another scribe perhaps.
The discussion on that day revolved around women in leadership roles. My argument related to the term ‘leadership’ and society’s constant focus of particular individuals on that list. Maybe it’s just me, but I am more interested in the stories about women like Sally Mugabe and what her thoughts were regarding Zimbabwe’s Independence, Gukurahundi in Matabeleland and the 1987 Unity accord for example. I am interested in what Winnie did for the liberation struggle in South Africa than what Madiba did whilst in prison. Indeed I am more interested in the role that women play in liberation struggles and revolutions in general. I cannot imagine how difficult it must be for a Mother to let her children go to war for a cause She clearly supports and yet allow Her own to leave to join that same struggle. I can only imagine the anguish. I am more interested in how Cherrie Blair and Laura Bush felt about going to war in Iraq not so long ago. I fear that this story is seldom told. Indeed this story must be documented and shared! I will admit that my mother and my sister play a crucial role in the way I feel about this particular issue. So it should not come as a surprise when I state that I see more women on that list of 50 top CEOs than most. This life we lead promotes us to see things in black and white most times. Maybe it’s just me but I see more shades of grey than most.
Many times we hear stories of leaders in various roles go home after a day of difficult negotiations with trade unions, employees, tax departments and so forth. Clearly there’s a problem that requires immediate attention. Pillow talk inspired moments perhaps or intimate dinner conversation and a remedy is found. That story is seldom told. Instead most see the man turn up for work the following day with a solution. Crisis over and we move on! Yet few acknowledge the source or the inspiration of the remedy. I was in Zimbabwe in June this year. I was lucky enough to attend a few business events during that period. I noticed one common thread with all the speakers. The various male speakers who thanked their wives first for the support they provided in the home but more importantly in their careers. Each time this happened I smiled from within. I ask why we don’t acknowledge her leadership role in the same way we acknowledge the other 5 or 6 CEOs I mentioned earlier. How come?
So this time, I turned to my old MBA text books. I recall reading a section on leadership with particular reference to the differences in the various types of leadership styles and so forth. In short, there are leaders that are appointed and those who aren’t. The latter can in some cases have greater influence than the former. I grew up seeing Dad tackling the corporate world head on whilst Mum worked tirelessly in the accounting practice she ran. I witnessed leadership in the home I grew up in a variety of roles. If I wanted emotional support then Mum was the parent I turned to – even to this day I still do this. If I wanted career advice I spoke to Dad. Mum was always and still is supportive of most ideas I have as long as I am happy. Even though I understood the importance of financial security, I also understood that money wasn’t always the focal point then.
Don’t get me wrong here but if you have two employees: a male and a female are working side by side doing the exact same job – their salaries must therefore be the same. I write today to challenge or highlight that leadership comes in different forms and not in the black and white version we are now accustomed to. Don’t get me wrong, but I still want to see more women represented in various leadership roles on that list of 50 CEOs I mentioned earlier.
I read a tweet the other day that re-inforced my thoughts on women and the leadership roles they play in our daily lives: -
ideasforafrica 70% of farms in Africa are women run, which is why they are so important when developing agriculture. -M. Gates #CGI2010
This tweet relates to a conference held this week and M.Gates in none other than Melinda Gates herself.
What I have learnt about life so far is that not everyone is meant to be a CEO for example. Leadership exists in other forms too; clearly not in the black and white shade that most of us see. There is definitely more shades of grey than most want to admit.
Thought-provoking.
I think if I knew the thoughts of a leaders’ spouse or partner on certain issues the leader had to be involved in, perhaps the most immediate thing that this demonstrates is that couples’ togetherness/connectedness. It’s just some sort of barometer on a totally different aspect of the leader’s life. Different fro what we see them being on TV or in print or in eMedia routinely.
It must be fantastic that those leaders (I hope!) that you heard thanking their wives, have a place they can go to. To switch off from demands, mandates, and/or KPIs. Just to be. Themselves. No badge. No cameras. No scrutiny. It might be that a lot of leaders may (unless asked of course) choose not to get into the details of their ’9-to-5′ when pillow-talk time does come – or dinner time – or whatever quality time.
Perhaps a leader who maintains this sort of balance is succeeding in a supremely important area. More than what they do. But rather, succeeding at being ‘who they are’. For that is a superset of ‘what they do’.
A TALE OF TWO LEADERSHIPS
Using the Gate’s as an example: as it turned out, William III’s wife hopefully shut her hubby up when he started geeking it up and passionately describing to Melinda the day Windows started using pre-emptive multi-tasking, 32-bit machine-code and VFAT to support long file names. I’m sure the satisfaction of knowing (in lay terms) that ‘Windows 95 was the most significant operating system ever released by Microsoft’ (and that darling Bill was a key LEADER of the computing world) was enough, even if she read it in the paper. I wonder if we’d have applauded or questioned Bill if Melinda featured anywhere in press conferences back in 1995 as Microsoft broke through the sky, and surged forth into deep-operating-system-space…
(In fact, to be a bit naughty here, people may not know but Melinda was a key member in the team that is behind Microsoft Bob, a product that no longer exists, and made #7 on a list of ‘worst Software Applications of all time’ – but Bill’s excuse is that they weren’t married yet!)
VERSUS
… in matters that involve life and death, and that need LEADERSHIP to effect change and drive progress, and inspire people to join a cause, we see the same man, who’d flow media-solo for so long not only have his wife visible, but is in fact equal partner and CO-LEADER in the drive. I’d almost say where the stakes are ‘so’ high on the moral/fundamental scale, it perhaps makes it necessary to see a couple stand together. You tend to see this in churches, and some counselling set ups too (it’s not always successful, though!). Politics routinely isn’t a life/death/absolutes-of-life sort of thing – but where men get detained for 20 years+, races are wiped out, violent mobs are sent forth, dogs are trained to target specific types of people, or weapons that cause destruction en-masse are sought out, one does wonder ‘what mama thinks’.
I better go have breakfast – but I just got another thought:
Would we ever have discussions like this if the 50 CEO’s list had 44 WOMEN as CEO’s, 6 men, and sirnige in fact called his friend a ‘female masculinist’ coz she’s wondering where the men are at???
“Honey, I’ll have my toast with peanut butter and margarine thanks…”
themajesticeagle
25/09/2010 at 01:53
Interesting angle there – ‘co-leaders’….thought provoking response there. I’ll be back after some thought..thank you for taking the time to stop by, read my thoughts and respond as well. Much appreciated
Sir Nigel
30/09/2010 at 23:07
I like this post, I do. My thoughts were drawn the other day to challenging how society defines us as humans and professionals. I have always been intrigued by personality tests such as Myer Briggs etc, and have soul searched for where I would “FIT” in this world. The answer is that I don’t “FIT”. To do so would be to box myself up, and if I do, I might as well be in a coffin. So back to how society defines us, I bet if we were to challenge the very core of such tools as IQ, personality tests etc, the results would be something of a paradigm shift within society. I have stopped trying to fit coz I am here, basically. If I were to try and fit, society’s tools of definition put in in the social worker or nurse box. Not that they are not valuable, but was I put into that box because I am a woman? Would it have put me into the engineer’s box if I portrayed more masculine characteristics? Has the MBA considered that potential leaders cannot be defined the way male leaders have historically been defined? Perhaps I am getting a bit too deep here, but such were my thoughts. I want to challenge society’s pre-defined… well… definitions.
Emang
27/09/2010 at 01:46
Emang,I like the direction you are talking this…not too deep at all.I get you – I really do. My angle with this post was for us to open our eyes and realise that just because things don’t always seem the way we think they should be, it doesnt mean that they aren’t. Make sense? There are leaders of different sizes,shapes, etc everywhere. Let’s focus on the grey matter instead of our typical black and white existence. Thank you for taking the time to respond to this post, really appreciate it
Sir Nigel
03/10/2010 at 02:23
By the way, one of Twitter friends asked me this question after she read this blog entry: – ‘Have you decided whether you are a male feminist?’
My response: – ‘I have a sister.I want her to have the same opportunities I have in life.If that makes me a male feminist, then so be it..’
Sir Nigel
27/09/2010 at 06:16
I know it’s been a littel while since this post, however, this has just come out:
http://www.forbes.com/wealth/power-women/gallery
Shade of grey?
themajesticeagle
08/10/2010 at 05:20
Definitely very interesting list – thanks for that!
Sir Nigel
09/10/2010 at 22:53